Sunday, 19 August 2018

My Own High Standards Are Stifling Me


I've been sat at my computer for about an hour now, starting then scrapping blog posts, wasting time researching how long it'll be until Venice sinks and occasionally just staring out of the window, hoping that somehow my view of the washing I currently have out on the line will spark some sort of genius inspiration within me and I'll write my best ever blog post. Ha ha.

I'm lucky that I don't get writer's block very often, but when I do it scares me a bit. Ever since I wrote my very first story at the grand age of five (titled The Lost Dady because I couldn't even write the letter 'b' yet, it was an oddly dark story about a girl who found a lost baby, then lost it herself, then found it again) writing has been my creative outlet and way of escapism. Writer's block makes me worry that I've just lost it, that I'll never actually be capable of writing anything again.

Whenever I write anything, whether it's a blog post or the book I've been meaning to write for the past six or more years, I often start with such a sense of optimistic motivation, only to do a complete u-turn a few moments later and decide that lol, what a rubbish idea, why was I ever excited about it and maybe I should just not write anything today. And it's not just writing this mindset of mine applies to, it's pretty much everything I do. Take something as simple as housework; one moment I'm full of motivation and being super productive, the next I'm sat down watching Love Island Australia having only done half the job I'd started, fed up at myself for not being good enough.

I impose such high standards upon myself for absolutely everything and it means I'm never 100% happy with anything I ever do because I always feel that I could have done better. The funny thing is, because I set myself up to fail, I actually always could do better. I spend so much time fannying around (yes I did just use that expression on my blog) and worrying about doing a good job, time that could have been spent actually getting on with it.

How do I stop myself from doing this? I don't really know the answer to that. I do know that at the moment I'm spending more of my time enjoying living rather than stressing about my next blog post or what my house looks like so that seems like a good start. It's important to remember than we're not superhuman and we simply can't do everything to the best of our ability, nobody can.

Do you impose high standards upon yourself?

Amy x


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14 comments

  1. Totally know where you're coming from with this one Amy! The past couple of days I've been reminding myself that I can do anything, but not everything. It's just not human! xx

    www.natalieleanne.com

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    1. Exactly! I think there's a lot of pressure (mostly self-inflicted) to be the best at everything we do, but it's just not possible! xx

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  2. I've definitely been guilty of this too Amy! There are many times that being a perfectionist has been a bit of a hindrance and I have to tell myself that everything doesn't need to be perfect x

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    1. It can be such a hindrance can't it! It's so frustrating but definitely need to take a step back! xx

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  3. If I'm ever in this frame of mind, looking around at a messy house, for example, because I've been too busy to clean it, I always ask myself how I'd feel about it on my death bed (bit morbid, but stick with me here): would I long to have had a cleaner, tidier house or would I lament missing out on having fun with the people I love? Seems like a simple answer, doesn't it, and it always helps me when I'm beating myself up for skipping a work-out in favour of a drink with an old mate, say x

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    1. That's a very good way to think about it! I definitely don't want to look back and just think of myself cleaning haha! xx

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  4. That story you wrote as a child sounds so cute! I can relate to having very high standards, I'm a perfectionist and a lot of the time I don't even want to start something because I feel like I won't be able to do a perfect job. I have managed to become a bit more relaxed in terms of blogging, I'm trying to see it as an outlet and a diary rather than a row of perfect pieces of writing. I can't help myself when it comes to uni though, I sometimes resubmit a piece of coursework 10 times. xx

    113thingstosay.com

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    1. Haha there were a fair few of them! I procrastinate so much because of it, but I'm definitely learning to be a bit more relaxed when it comes to blogging! xx

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  5. This is such an interesting topic and one I'm sure we can all relate to in some way or another! To answer your question, although I don't think I impose high standard on myself in 'life', I definitely do when it comes to work. As always, a brilliant read, Amy!

    aglassofice.com x

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    1. Well that's good that you have a balance, and it's a fine line between trying your best and imposing too high a standard isn't it! xx

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  6. I think we can be so hard on ourselves sometimes striving for perfect and it just leads to feeling blocked as we never feel we are good enough! :)

    I'm lucky with my blog it's pretty much a set format each post and I can usually always find something to say - but I do schedule posts in advance so I can write when the mood strikes and not stress about having to have something to post. My posts are not was labour intensive to put together though as a properly written post like yours, haha!

    Hope that you are having a really good week :)

    Away From The Blue Blog

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    1. I used to write in advance and it was so much easier, but somewhere along the way fell out of that good habit! xx

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  7. I completely agree with this post and feel like this often but I don't think that it's a bad thing to have high standards! If you're not in the right mindset to write or do whatever it is you are supposed to be doing, I think it's better not to force it. Love Island Australia sounds tempting too!!
    Have a lovely weekend :)
    Rosanna x
    Rose's Rooftop

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    1. I definitely agree it's best not to force it! And it is good to have high standards, just not when it means I don't actually end up starting anything haha xx

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