Planning A Wedding When You Don't Like Attention

Weddings are lovely aren't they? The moment the bride walks down the aisle and everyone oooh and aaahs at how beautiful she looks before training their eyes on the groom to gauge his reaction and hope they can spy the odd tear. Smiling along to the groom's speech as he sings the bride's praises. Waiting with bated breath to hear what song they've chosen as their first dance before collectively sighing an 'awww' when they start singing the lyrics to each other.

I hadn't really considered what it might feel like to actually be the bride and groom in any of these situations until I started planning my own wedding. Both Nick and I hate being the centre of attention so planning our wedding has been a bit of a tricky one because we will, undeniably, be centre of attention on that day. What we've tried to do is make the day as relaxed as possible so we'll hopefully feel at ease and we've opted out of some of the wedding traditions where we'd be more in the spotlight and would just be totally uncomfortable (seeya later first dance). So, in case you're like us too, I thought I'd share a few pointers because weddings really aren't made for those of us who'd rather be in the background are they?

G U E S T S  |  It felt important to me to only invite people we'd met (so no random plus ones we didn't know) and to keep the guest list fairly small so we wouldn't feel overwhelmed. Our guest list ended up at around 70, which isn't exactly minimal, but it's not huge either and it's made up of people we feel comfortable around and know quite well. Most of these people also know us quite well and they'll know that we won't want a fuss made of us. A guest list is a hard part of planning a wedding - do you invite you friend's new boyfriend you've never met? How can you invite this person without offending another? Having simple rules helps and, at the end of the day, people care much less than you think they do whether they're invited to your wedding or not.

V I B E  |  We didn't really want our wedding to feel like a wedding, more like a summer party at which we just happen to be getting married. This means we've kept our whole vibe very relaxed. Our venue is very DIY and in a way fairly minimalist so we can do what we want with it and I know the owner so feel at ease with her. We're not having a very formal meal, a friend from work is taking a few snaps and people are camping afterwards (including us) in a big field behind the venue so it'll hopefully just be very laid back!

T R A D I T I O N S  |  As I mentioned, we've done away with quite a few traditions that just didn't feel very 'us'. We're not having speeches, we're not having a first dance and we're not having any posed photos. I personally love watching other people's first dances but I know we'd hate every second of having everyone's eyes on us. I think it's important to not feel any pressure to include certain things in your day just because they're the generally done thing. It's your wedding remember!

Are there any traditions you'd do away with?

Amy x