Sunday, 14 August 2016

How Blogging Has Made Me Less Bitchy


This is kind of a scary post to write because I don't want it to come across in the wrong way, but hopefully I'll manage to jumble some words together that make sense and put across what I want to! I'm not trying to say that I was a massive bitch before I started blogging - I like to think I was quite a nice person, but I would say I was quite judgmental. I'd make assumptions based on few facts about people and even though I wouldn't voice my assumptions I'd still make them in my head.

I think blogging has given me an excellent opportunity to mix with lots of different people - mainly just over social media and through commenting on each other's blogs/Instagram. It's also given me the chance to read a lot of other blogs written by people from all walks of life and also to see the horrific comments and abuse some of these people receive online. 

Now here's where I'm going to be 100% honest and hope you don't all hate me for it. I was completely judgemental of bloggers before I actually took the time to understand the blogosphere and subsequently start blogging myself.

Let me give an example to try and explain my point properly/dig myself out of this hole. I've seen a popular blogger receive nasty comments on Instagram for posting bikini/underwear pictures. Previously I would have made the assumption that this girl must love herself and be really self-centred to post a picture like that, which is exactly what some of the comments were suggesting. I would NEVER have commented it, but I might have thought it. Now through actually making the effort to read her blog and interact with her on Twitter I know that this isn't the case at all. She absolutely has a smoking hot body and an inspirational Instagram feed because of it, but she also has insecurities and off days just like the rest of us, plus she is an absolutely lovely person.

Bloggers receive a lot of unfair criticism and it really truly annoys me to see women tearing other women down when we should all be sticking together and admiring each other. I read a really good quote recently, which I can't remember exactly and I didn't write down, but it was something about channeling our jealousy of other women into something positive and using them as inspiration instead. The quote put it much better but you get the gist.

Previously I have been ignorant and I will throw my hands up and admit that. I've thought nasty things about people just because of the way they dress, I've judged people just on one comment they've made. I think at some point in our lives we all have (unless you're a total saint and then kudos to you).

I think I would have grown up a bit and changed anyway, but I really think blogging sped up the process by allowing me to see past the dreamy Instagram feeds and understand that we are all people and though we may have different personalities, different styles and different ways of going about our lives there is no right or wrong and we should respect each others differences.

What I've found in general is that most people are nice and as long as people are nice then I'm not ever going to make a judgement based on anything else.

How has blogging changed you?

Amy x


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32 comments

  1. Yey I'm glad blogging has made you think this way, I love the dreamy insta feeds, even if I do have a little blogger envy at how great people look haha

    Rosy | Sparkles of Light Blog

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    1. I do find them much more inspirational rather than being jealous that mine doesn't look like that haha. Thanks for your comment :) xx

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  2. Well... I have been blogging for a long time now. I used to write articles in mags... now I pour it on my blog 😊
    http://sepatuholig.blogspot.com
    IG @grace_njio

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    1. Oooh I love reading blogs written by people who used to write for magazines! xx

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  3. it's crazy how much criticism bloggers receive but in the end it's mostly just jealousy. being on the other side definitely has helped me to realize that as well!

    danielle | avec danielle

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    1. It's crazy isn't it, but I'm glad I'm on the blogging side! xx

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  4. Well done on such an honest post. I think it's human nature to do this - the main thing is to at least keep those thoughts to yourself! We could all be a bit more open minded :)

    Nina | www.wordsbynina.com

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    1. Definitely! Totally agree we should keep it to ourselves - if you've nothing nice to say then don't say anything at all :) xx

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  5. Being online and surrounded by a lot of hate makes you begin start to think that way! Judging people by their looks is one of the worst things and I'm glad that blogging has enabled you to ever come it! I love that blogging also helps bloggers in their lives :)

    Sarah | What Sarah Writes

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    1. I'm so glad I've become more open minded from it :) xx

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    1. Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it! x

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  7. I love this and feel the same. It's kind of like with YouTubers. There are a few fitness youtubers that at first I thought would be really up themselves because they're stunning and have great bodies, but then I've watched their videos and can see they work really hard to look the way they do and are really kind and lovely with their friends and to their fans!

    Corinne x
    www.skinnedcartree.com

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    1. Exactly! I'm glad you understand and have been through the same! xx

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  8. Thank you sooo much for sharing this & your honesty, lovely. I completely understand what you mean and where you're coming from. Don't think one bit that you could label yourself with a b-word, hon. It's somewhat easy to go ahead and judge someone without actually getting to know (read: taking the time to get to know them), especially if we see that they are so pretty/successful/happy/etc. To be honest, I am terrified when I hear people say: "I'm so jealous!". I know it doesn't necessarily mean that they are dying of jealousy (and it could be said lightly). Sadly, sometimes it does turn ugly.
    It's so important for all of us to look at our own lives and be thankful for everything we are blessed with <3 I am so glad you joined the blogosphere & that your attitude changes, sweetie. Honestly, you're one of the kindest gals out there! :)
    Btw, this post just shows how much we are on the same wavelength since I have written & pre-scheduled a post on jealousy/negativity/insecurities and all that jazz. Spoiler: it has a happy ending :D
    Ok, before this comment becomes a mile-long essay, I better just tell you that I admire you, lovely. Thanks for sharing this, for being so honest and showing once again that you have a heart of gold <3
    xox Nadia
    www.mielandmint.com

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    1. Thank you so much for such a lovely comment babe! I'm so glad you understand and I can't wait to read your own thoughts on the topic in your upcoming post! Thank you for totally making my day with this comment! xxx

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  9. This is so inspiring! I love the post:)

    irenethayer.com

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    1. Thank you so much I'm glad you liked it! x

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  10. Great post Amy, it's good to let to you feelings like this. Have a great day! Gemma x
    www.jacquardflower.uk

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    1. Thanks Gemma, hope you have a good day too :) xx

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  11. Such an honest post!! I loved reading this!! Thank you so much for posting this! <3

    Amelia | Amelia Grace

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    1. Ah thank you so much, I'm glad being honest hasn't backfired on me haha! xx

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  12. I really enjoyed reading this post and I do relate to it, I definitely care more about other people after learning more about them and I love reading nice comments, it's a great community to be part of!
    Have a lovely day :)
    Rosanna x
    Rose's Rooftop

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    1. I'm so glad you can relate to this! Thank you for your comment, hope you've had a lovely day :) xx

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  13. Thank you for sharing this, I think that we can all very much relate to this post. I have never seen anyone address this topic though so it was refreshing to read about it. Blogging has also changed me in many ways. And the most important thing I learned is that we are all humans and have insecurities and problems. You can always really see the facade of someone, this person might go through struggles and never show it. That's why it's important to listen before judging. I also think that blogging has made me more tolerant, just like travelling actually. In both cases you meet many different people and learn to be open-minded. xx

    113-things-to-say.blogspot.com

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    1. Such a lovely and true comment, blogging has definitely made me more tolerant and open minded. I'm so glad you can relate to this too and that you found it a refreshing read, that really means a lot! Thank you Mira :) xx

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  14. I really loved reading this post, thanks for the honesty and I think so many of us can relate to everything you've said (I surely can). What I most love about blogging is the way it has enabled me to 'meet' so many different people in every possible way and it's made me realise that the only thing that matters is the heart of the person and how great human beings they are...and we should constantly support and encourage each other, that's the only way to silence all the negativity that happens around the blogosphere from time to time.

    Have a great week, Amy!
    xx

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    1. Thank you so much Matea, I totally agree that we should be supporting and encouraging each other and luckily for me that's the only experience of the blogosphere I've had so far! I've loved getting to know people from blogging! xx

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  15. Lovely post to read. I also feel that with some of the IG dreamy posts, to me they are more inspirational. I think we all have been proper jealous at one point. It's always good to take the high road and not to judge others, especially based on a perfectly edited image, haha. There will always be a few bad apples out there, but overall blogging for me is all about expressing myself, being an inspiration to others, and also getting inspired. Glad to hear your honest thoughts and experiences. Have a lovely week./Madison x
    FASHION TALES

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    1. Yeah I definitely take them as inspiration now and I've had nothing but a positive experience of blogging myself which I feel very lucky for! Thank you for such a lovely comment xx

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  16. Loooove this. SO true! I think Blogging is such an amazing thing that can actually help you become the best version of yourself.

    Love, Kerstin
    http://www.missgetaway.com/

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    1. Thank you, it has definitely helped me that way! xx

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